Closing Circles

“Closing Circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over.” Paulo Coelho.

2022 has been that year on many fronts for a great number of people both individually and collectively.  What to let go of and leave behind.?  One thing we do know is that we cannot go backwards and recreate the past. Embracing a different perspective and ‘view’ releases the shackles of how things should be and allows the focus on what could be. 

A wonderful exhibition of embodying this totally was the recent Women’s Rugby World cup held in  New Zealand in November. Each individual picked up the mantle of how things could be and this ‘mana’ infiltrated the whole team. It would have been so very different if there was not this alignment to a purpose that was bigger than the game itself. To position the women’s game on the World stage and in so doing contribute towards the uniting of a country, after more than year of division. They reframed the way the general populace viewed the women’s game. This was all taking place concurrently with three other men’s World Cups. It is no surprise that the latter had a lot more media attention and coverage. 

The real story is that it was about closing circles, shutting doors on outdated beliefs and opening new opportunities. 

It took last year’s capitulation on the Northern Tour to force NZ Rugby’s hand. They had underinvested in the women’s game and become complacent in their existing status. They launched an all-out rescue mission, parachuting in a star-powered coaching line-up. Finally committing meaningful resources to the Black Ferns programme.

It was  the players who seized the moment during this tournament on NZ Rugby’s behalf. They won  the hearts of the country with a fast-paced, exciting, and yes, occasionally maddening, brand of rugby. They were unapologetically themselves on and off the field – allowing their stories to be told, with Smith serving as their understated “hype man”.

“I never thought in 100 years we’d be standing out in the middle of Eden Park and 40,000 people would be chanting ‘Black Ferns’,” said an incredulous Smith after Saturday’s showstopper of a final.

In six short months, Caretaker coach Wayne Smith’s instilled an unwavering sense of belief in the side. Demant had confidence that the Black Ferns’ “courageous” game-plan driven by an all-out attacking mindset would see them come out on top.

“We play our best rugby when our minds are free and we play with joy, and I guess that’s where the calmness kicked in. “

“We knew where the space was, we just had to get the ball there.”

This is a wonderful example of being fully present in oneself, at one with the environment and fully aware of the bigger context.

From the outset, the Black Ferns adopted the mindset that they were prepared to risk it all for world rugby’s ultimate prize – Nancy – as the cup is affectionately known. At the death knoll when facing England’s renown maul, instead of defending it in the line out they stepped up, and ….stole the line out, thereby extinguishing England’s advantage. Ball was taken down and penalty awarded. GAME OVER. The Black Ferns stood tall, and “Nancy” was their’s once more.  

Heart over head. 

Sport played by women is different. It has that wairua. It has heart. It has authenticity. That’s exactly what we’ve seen from the now six-time Rugby World Cup champions Black Ferns during the Rugby World Cup and that is what has captured the imagination of people usually not remotely interested in the game – it was the ‘esprit de corps’ .

Whilst I would not call myself an avid rugby fan, I liked their sense of commitment to self and each other and I connected with the ‘wairua’. 

It made me reflect on which doors I still need to shut, which circles to close and which chapters to close, for those moments are in the past and not what I need to take forward on my path – even it is in limbo on some level – it is important to enjoy the magic of the unknown.  to ensure there is ‘wairua’, a deeper meaning, a deeper connection to something within.

For those of us who constantly seek newness, distraction and busyness in order to outrun reality, this is challenging. So many of your old tricks which always got immediate results in the past, are no longer working. That energy is now deleted, let it go.

It’s a time for tying up loose ends of all kinds, for completing incompletions, for weeding out entanglements that keep you stuck or small. Deeply letting go means looking at what needs to change without guilt or judgement. Wipe the slate clean……

Ask: 

• What do I need to resolve or eliminate?

• What am I compelled to create?

You are now in a moment where you get to review, rethink, and recreate just about anything you want. This may involve any facet of your life. Let go of any emotional attachment. 

Get really real, and ask: “what’s the one thing I’m afraid to say about my life and what am I going to do about it?”

Endings and completions are important, as to walk tall on your path, and stand tall in your truth you first need to connect with your wairua. 

As the revered Angeles Arrien, a wonderful teacher I was blessed to study with said, find what has heart and meaning, stay committed to the path, and then enjoy the journey. Just as the Black Ferns did. 

In closing the year, may we take time to be grateful for the learnings, the fortitude and resolve each of you may have experienced in different ways. It is the part of the path.

“Pursue some path, however narrow and crooked, in which you can walk with love and reverence.”  Henry David Thoreau.